So yesterday i find out that there is some gossip going around about Ryan through the family. Of coarse it's not true, which is what makes it gossip... but i guess i was just pissed off about how everyone decided to spread it around. Need-less-to-say i'm pissed off at my dad and Aaron... the bastards

Since it's the last day of 2001 i thought we would reflect on this last year.
1- parent officially separated
2- went through several boyfriends who most were just wrong for me... to say the least
3- found my ONE
4- got fairly good grades for not taking a semester off
5- decided on my major
6- took a useless vacation, well not really useless... learned a lesson though so i guess it was valid

I guess i could go on for awhile, but who REALLY wants to hear about that.

So New Years is a day to make sappy resolutions that you probably aren't going to keep... so this year i'm just not going to make ANY.

i do have to post the best 5 albums of 2001 and THE BASTARD OF THE YEAR awards. Some traditions are so much fun.

So i bought my books yesterday... holy shit fuck batman... $450.23 for 14 textbooks. So for all those that now think, what the hell is school for anyways? Let me know and well talk about how much everyone hates the prices of school (smiliesteph@hotmail.com)

Yeah so i think the fan list of this little site has gone down, by quite a large sum. Those that normal take a gander are home for the holiday so need-less-to-say they will be suprised upon their return.

School starts on the 3rd, and i have work on new years eve and new years day... how bad does that suck?

Anyways not really much to say today sorry folks. Anything interesting happen to you?

So i have to buy my books today... i'm scared. i have enough i hope, but all my classes have about 4-5 books a peice... need-less-to-say all new books is about 300 buck a roo's UGH! Anyways gotta run...

BTW- does anyone know where nick has been lately?

can i tell you it's strange to think that i have only been awake for 6 hours!!! hmmm

So i guess there is traits that i didn't know that i had. Hmm that's actually very strange. I guess it's just one of those things though.

anyways. Yesterday went to THE PIE up here on campus. I tell you the most i spend up here outside of school the more i like it :) I think i need to go see 'The Fellowship of the Rings' Why you maybe ask.... well i have read most of JRR Tolken's books and well other than the Hobbit (that was a cartoon) and the Return of the Kings (also a cartoon) this movie is done by REAL actors, with REAL land and REAL goblins and wizards and things. i guess i'm expecting too much about this movie. Oh well... I guess it's just one of those things.
The computers are ringing here. Must stop the ringing in my ears... it's driving me crazy!!! ahhh. I'm going to change computers that's what i should do... change computers.

registaring today :).... wait it's Christmas... Merry Christmas. Today was an all around good day. Nothing bad has happened other than the fact that i had to get up at 7:20 (well that's the time that we got up) and opened presents.. Yay presents. **1**

Anyways back to the reason at hand. School. Grades for last semester 3.5 that was better than i thought it was going to be. I guess it was wonderful **2**
Classes registared for
HIST TH 9:10-10:30 Ancient Near East
HIST MWF 8:35-9:25 Recent America
HIST TH 7:30-8:50 America at War
POL S Sat. 9:00-12:00 Introduction to Comparrative Politics
Well it's lots of history so i like it. The art history isn't really what i wanted i think... hmmm. i'll figure something out.

Have a wonderful holiday. I have work tomorrow which sucks and lots of books to save up money for. Oh well. Anyways i guess eat well and dream of large women (Princess Bride... what a good show)

**1** as far as presents goes i got a heating blanket... just what i always wanted (you think i'm being saracstic but i'm not, that's what i wanted)
**2** I was expecting to get a 3.0 my GPA is a 3.3 bad-fucking-ass is all i have to say

i am watching one fucked up show on life time i tell you it just strange it's about some girl that thinks she's some gambler.... i'm glad i'm not into that shit. I guess it's just one of those things.

Anyways it's almost Christmas time. I'm one the beginnings og number 5 and about 20 hours to go... hope i make it. It will be one of those maybe, maybe not things... AHHHH.

i though i'd let you know i'm still alive and well eventhough most of the weekend has gone by and i haven't said a thing. Sorry folks

Anyways so work dragged today as expected. There wasn't much to do and the people i was working with today were driving me crazy. oh well. When i get home though i'm wrapping Christmas presents. I am SO in the mood for Christmas this year. i know i'm not getting any REAL presents because everyone is on a poor basis right now. Which is actually half od the fun. Speaking of money... my car payments due today... sometimes i hate having bills. The thing here is that my car was a present. Logically you would think that i wouldn't have to worry about it. I guess that's just what happeneds in this here family.... fend for yourself (my mom always used to say....(like i'm speaking about my mother if she were dead... she's not... ))

S i really want to go and see 'Fellowship of the Rings' anyone that has already seen it email me and tell me what you thought about it (smiliesteph@hotmail.com) i do really want to know how it is. Is it worth the line to get in? Is it REALLY worth 3 hours of time? is it just a killer ass movie that all should see? Let me know!!!

So i'm making these scarfts for the little ones. Need-less-to-say my right hand is going numb... oh welll they take about 6 hours a scarf and i still have 5 left to go...AHHHHHHHH. other than that work is going slow which always sucks, but it's alright because atleast i get to talk to people all day long :) be back later!!!

I know all of you are saying give things time (this i'm saying because of the emails i've recieved recently) and like i've been explaining to people that once you find the right one, and only when you find the right one, will this happen to you too. There is a feeling that i can't just push away... i wish i could, but it doesn't work like that. People say not to rush into things but thats the reason why marriage rates are down and divorce rates are up. People are becoming to hesitent of the choices they are making, it's like no one can really decide what they want and i think once you know and understand what you want.... it's just a feeling in your heart that can't be described it, i wish i could explain it to people.

Anyways back to what this is supposed to be about, as if this has structure or anything....
So for the past week i have been doing nothing... nothing. How bad does this suck. it was Nick's birthday on the 14th good for him, happy big 20 man :) I've done some Christmas shopping, how i hate spending so much money for gifts. Did i tell you i'm making all the neices and nephew's scarfs for christmas. How cute is that. Last year i made them blankets and the year before i think i just bought gifts. It's more fun to make them i think.

I need to go to a concert soon or i might go insane. i crave the sound of live bands. The fact that after ward you can't really hear anything, and say anything for that matter.

I'm on campus right now and can i tell you that no one is here. It's a random person here and there but no real people, no real functions. Most people are moved out of the dorms and back to there homes. And well the rest of the people have no reason to be on campus. It's crazy!!!

I have good news to tell folks.....
Ryan wants to get married.... i'll inform you all when i get a ring.... how cool is this. I know you all are thinking that this is too quick but hell i have found the RIGHT one. Now i understand how people can get married so quickly... i want to be with him all the time. Not only for the sex... even though the sex is great!!! anyways i should head...

Sort but sweet today... i gotta run. I guess i write to make sure that all of you know that yesterday at work i had the best time. I love going to work... i mean LOVE it!!!

Okay sometimes i'm thankful for trackers. i mean how else would you find out how people are finding your site. or who is even visiting for that matter
Yahoo: dating and legal seperation
Google: "make her eyes do that"
Yahoo: legal seperation and dating
Google: my husband treats me poorly because i have low self esteem
google: "lets think of something to do"
Yahoo: I Love bnl
Yahoo: ice skating 2001 with the song who let the dogs out
Google: oops country gals
Google: tabitha's secret blue monday
Yahoo: christmans ideas
Google: "mom got drunk"
Google: "it must have been three years since we last spoke"
Google: "john mayer" + "St. Patrick's Day"
Google: "when it comes to december it's obvious why"
Google: "saddest songs of all time"
Google: ice skating oops
Google: outback shoes blog
Google: "Stephanie Adamson"
Google: bliss 66 "sooner or later" lyrics

Alright folks i don't really have to work for the next hour and a half so i will just go off momentarily.

To start with i just got out of a final that for the first time in my life it took the whole 3 hours to finish it. Jesus, is all i have to say. It was hard, i was uncertain on 4 of them (40 points out of 100) and well i think i just sucked this up. Honestly i need to understand why i always do so bad in comprehensive finals. I mean my brain freezes up until i remember that this problem was from about X time in the class. I think that i honestly don't like it... i don't like it at all.

As for finals in general that was my last one for this semester. Grades will be posted in 2 weeks here on the internet so i'll let you know then. As for my grades here is what i think they are..... Stat's- B History-C Writing-B Ceramics-B.... all in all probably the poorest semester i've had since i've gone to school here. Yeah i wasn't too focused this semester, because i always had better things to do than study. i guess that i just hold myself to a higher standard than most. Originally my goal for the beginning of the semester was to get a 4.0... yeah that would happen (hencing sarcasm) and now it looks like it will be down in the 2 range. Where have i gone wrong?

No one to other things... It seems as though yesterday i was extremely stressed out. i spent most of the day in my room sleeping or trying to sleep. i think i had the worst sleep i have ever had last night. Why, you might be asking, maybe it was just nerves or maybe it was something else... i don't know. But if i have problems sleeping again tonight i might kill someone. i need a goodnights rest!!!

Ryan's apartment is looking good. We have to go to the DI and get some banana chairs and maybe a small table. There is no where to sit there. i'm not joking, the only place is the bed or the floor. And we all know what happens when we 'sit' on the bed. So the dog piss carpet is where we sit.

It's extremely cold outside... yes i know i'm talking about the weather, but is is note worthy. Just walking around campus i think i got frost bit on my fingers. Yesterday it didn't get above freezing and it doesn't look like today is going to either... sometimes i hate it here in Salt Lake... it's just extremely cold in the winter and extremely hot in the summer.... DAMN THE MAN

So my sister Mindie just found out that i was her secret santa last year. That's funny my family kept a secret for one whole year. My dad did too. It almost worked.... So a final tomorrow and work and a little after finals party. :)

Alright folks. Yesterday was a whole lot of nothing. Went to Ryan's after work at the bookstore and stayed there the night. Woke up this morning went into GYFT cleaned out my desk, than up to school to sell back my books. Than back home... to my home. I need to study for my stat's test tomorrow... i'm scared!!! That test is going to be a bitch. I need to some how find a way to pay for classes for this last semester (the 'rents can't really pay for it) i Have to figure something out though... hmmm what to do what to do.... oh well so i just won't registar for next semester.

so i just sat through and hour and a half of training. UGH! thespacebarisn'tworkingsoi'mnotgoingtowriteanymore

Well folks i'm all better thank god. Two days with out alcohol was driving me crazy... does this mean i'm an alcoholic... naaaa. Anyways i got an email from some people wishing me to get better and i did, whoo hoo.

So i'm no longer at GYFT i've started training at the bookstore, which is actually what i'm waisting time to go and do here in a little while. I should probable head over in a minute. i think that my life is going wonderfully. Boyfriend situation is fine, school is fine, work is okay (once i get fully started it should be fine too), friends are going good. I guess no matter how bad things were before the better they are getting now, which is always a plus in my book. Why is it that when you are happy you tend to write about nothing but when you are sad you only write about the things that are making you that way... hmmm. Personally i've found as far as men is concerned when i'm totally happy with them i don't talk about them, but when i'm angry and upset by them they get mentioned frequently.... why is that.

I guess it's time for me to go to work now.... hopefully i meet some new people to go and hang out with... that will be a good time all in it's self.

I am sick. It started yesterday at Ryan's at about 12:00 midnight when i had to leave there and go home... UGH! My head hurts, my ears hurt, my tummy hurts, and my body aches... i wonder what it is. If anyone knows any home remedies let me know (smiliesteph@hotmail.com)

Howdy folks (teehee you would think that i was a hick)

Last night went to a fun little pre-finals party, with Ryan's friends which is always a blast. WE have some business dinner to get to tonight though... i'll fill you all in laters, right now i have to go though.

Alright folks... sorry i haven't really been around for awhile. Things haven't really been too busy, just not really at GYFT anymore so no real computer access. things will be slower for awhile.

Ryan and I bought a Christmas tree yesterday and decorated it. I made gloves to match my scarf, they didn't turn out too well though, because the thumb and the pinky fingure are too long. I have a final tomorrow which is scary because i really don't know the subject well.

I guess i like it that Ryan is move out. I sleep down there more than i sleep here at home so i've come to like it better. Him and i have talked about this 'marriage' idea which is all well and good, but do you REALLY think it's going to happen..... nope, alright.

Were is everybody today... it's like no one is here. Oh well i think it's just funny. The interview went well at Media Play, i have to call back on Friday. Ummm i took a final today that was actually easier than i thought it was going to be... crazy eh? i guess somethings are just all sorts of crazy.
Anyways i talked to my dad today about Ryan and we REALLY liked him... hmm.. that's strange dad doesn't really like anyone. Jebus!!!

okay in sterio is Lionel Richie Album Can't Slow Down

My grandmother takes things way out of proportion. Situation.... okay well i wasn't really answering the phone an she just had a hissy fit about how no one is helping her out. now she's not really talking to me.

I'm trying to talk some people out of talking to this stalker.. and that's today

Sometimes i'm glad things happen. I mean yeah it sucked at the time, but now i'm honestly HAPPY. The only real Stressful thing in my life is finals, which i have reason to be stressed for, but everything else seems to be doing fine.

Yesterday Ryan met my dad, which i have to say wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. We went to Chilie's which is always a plus. anyways after this I went with Ryan to pack up his shit and move across town. Where we had lots of alcohol and eventually got as drunk as fuck. Anyways went back to my house quickly 'round 10:30 when i get this nasty message on my answering machine from James... So i called him back and he was just bitching about how no one in the group is really doing anything (which in all honestly he has a right to bitch) As such though it lead the evening to be very testy and very grumpy (i think that's just what James does to me... oh well at least i found this out) Also slept down at Ryan's which was actually pretty fun... there's a story about his bed but i don't think it's a good idea to share at the moment, but ask me personally and i'll let you know. Woke up this morning to a freezing car that was parked all sorts of far away, but i guess that things just work out that way.

But on the lighter side i have yet another interview today which should go wonderfully. I hope i get that job it should be loads of fun. At any rate... it think i'm going to head out of here sucka's and start studying... Final tomorrow at 8:30, it's my history final so, logically, i should do fine.

song: Dreams of our Fathers Band: Dave Matthews Band Slbum: Everyday

Rain on my head, rain on my head, rain on me

Well today is honestly a good day :) which is always a wonderful idea to comprehend. I ran into James at school, yet again only wuick civil conversation. anyways i got the job at the bookstore but it's only seasonal so i don't really know what to do there. I have an interview tomorrow at 4 with Media Play so that's always a good thing. Ryan is moving into his apartment tonight and well today is just going wonderfully

So everyone, sorry i haven't be around most of the weekend but somethings have happened.
For one thing Ryan isn't moving to Vegas, he's getting an apartment down town. another is that for most of the weekend i was drunk.... to the extent of not being able to operate machinery. and one more is that finals are upon us. i know that the professors aren't supposed to have testes on the last days of class but all of mine seemed to think that they could get away with it (the bastards). Anyways other than that nothing REALLY happened this weekend... Sorry no exciting news.

Oh yeah i have an interview here in about 3 hours and Media Play wants to set up an interview with me... whoo hoo. Things are almost working out in that department.