meow meow meow

really things are funny

Sunday, September 23, 2001

Well he's okay... he called came over and we talked, which was fine. After he left though i drove... around.

massive amounts of flags, 6 seven-elevens, 3 fire stations, 2 malls and a court house later i found myself coming to one thought... That i'm not being used. i'm not saying that i have thought that i was, i haven't. I just had to think through this love that i have and make sure that i was being rational. I'm also not saying here that i'm not afraid to be hurt, because with relationships comes pain... i'm just not scared to be used. I have honestly been used my whole life, and not only by men... sexually. But by family members more emotionally, friends also the same. I am willing to give him anything that i have to make him happy. even if it's holding his hand in a movie when i'm not really in the mood. Or if it's going over because he doesn't want to be sitting in bed alone. I think this is how things have gotten confusing. When did i cross this line, and why can't i go back? why do i miss him when he's not around? Please help and answer some questions...

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