Song: Big Blue Sea Artist: Bob Schneider Album: Lonelyland

I know i'll never know nobody
better than i know myself
but i can't even figure out
just what the fuck i'm all about

Why is it that when you went to jr high back in the day you always got a new pair of shoes for the first day of school. and you couldn't wear them until that day. Yet now i don't thinking i've gotten a new pair of shoes since 99'. This is insane. Also at this time period, back in the day, i found you always had clean clothes or new clothes, you always had food around the house, and well i've just found how rapidly times have changed.

I've been thinking about that for a while now and i guess this is just saying that i wish i had a new pair of shoes... for the fact that i could still live in that carefree life.

Also last night i felt safe. I think that's why i like to have other people sleep with me... to feel safe. this is not to say that i was taken advantage of at a young age, because that's not the case. I have just always had someone to sleep, at least in the same room, with me. I have shared a room for ever than about 3 years ago Mindie got married and i haven't shared a room with someone. (well there has been an exception... but we wont get into that) 3 years ago on Oct 3rd.. how strange.. hmmm. Anyways i like to have people sleep with me. it's not the cuddling that i like, well i like the cuddling it's just not the reason why i like to have people sleep with me. It's the security of someone else. I think that's why i also don't like to go places by myself...

Oh going out tonight... i'm excited, i like not knowing were i'm going. It was my understanding that me, mom, and myke were going to Outback Stake House... but that fell through and now i'm going out with James :) I love going out with him... it makes my day better, which is always a plus.

I love danger... things that are risky... things that you might get dirty looks for... or my life being at risk in certain situations. Does this make sense? (smiliesteph@hotmail.com)

Alright i need to go off. (Kat this will piss you off) So yesterday on the front page of the Salt Lake Tribune is an announcement that the congressional districts have been re-drawn. Well it's, as you had expected, district 2... the only democratic territory. The Utah State Legislature put the boundary lines at 700 East making down town split. Pretty much making it almost impossible to get another democratic congressman. Sometimes i hate republicans. They can't just accept the fact that Salt Lake City is become more diverse... what's going to happen in Feb. these mormons are going to go crazy. Also everyone coming into Salt Lake will because all of the public establishments here are no smoking... and everywhere else in the country is half and half... This is really going to fuck with peoples heads. I was walking out to my car, with James, when i saw a sign in front of the stadium that said... 'this is a no smoking facility' crazy!!!